The Essence of Me

I rarely panic. Even now, with all the deadlines and the things I need to do, I am still as calm as a turtle (have you ever seen a turtle in a hurry? I sure haven’t). I need motivation, and what’s more effective than the realization that you are getting older?

Some of my friends would protest that twenty-five isn’t old. The thing is, I feel old. Here I am, existing for a quarter of a century already and have achieved absolutely nothing. I have not yet realized even one of my many dreams. And what are these dreams, you might ask? Well, scroll down, dear reader.

I want to have money in the bank. Not millions, just enough for me not to worry about college money (for my brother and sister). Enough for me to pursue another degree in creative writing or psychology or comparative literature. Enough to start the renovation of our crumbling old house. Enough to buy a notebook (I hope I’d be able to buy one before the year ends). Enough to make my dad happy.

I want to go to Europe. I don’t care if it’s just a week or a month. I just want to breathe the Parisian air, bask in the Florentine sun, take a walk on Roman streets (although this is akin to suicide the way Romans drive), and enjoy English tea in a London cafe. I want to be awed by the beauty of Scottish highlands, and blush like a schoolgirl when I see Irish boybands (I just had to include that haha!). I want to walk the streets of Berlin while silently contemplating the cruelty of the Germans in Hitler’s reign. Sigh! I really, really want to visit Europe.

Now, don’t laugh, but I also want to be a singer. I don’t care if it’s in a band, or in bars and restaurants, just not a recording artist. I want to perform in front of people. I know it’s crazy, but there’s nothing wrong with dreaming, right?

I want to watch Sarah Brightman live. She’s just phenomenal.

I want to be kissed in the rain. Sorry, I just can’t suppress my romantic side.

I want to write a novel. One that’s worthy to be published.

I want to be really good at playing the guitar.

That’s all for now. Paulo is calling.